The beginning of my conscious fashion journey can be separated into two chapters, the dream and the mental process. The dream kickstarted my discovery of ethical fashion and kept me motivated, but it was changing my consumer mindset that transformed me into who I am today.
The Dream
Where did it all start? It started as a crazy dream, as a vision board on my wall. I imagined myself as Camille, the sustainable fashion designer. There I stood in the middle of the board next to two models wearing my elaborate designs. It was a fairy tale, but I didn’t know that yet.
My naïveté was propelling me into an industry more complex, cut-throat and nasty than I could have imagined. I moved forward into the darkness, wide-eyed and making every mistake. Decisions were made based on gut feeling not cash flows. But within the uncertainty something beautiful and unexpected began to take shape. Yes, there were some cute clothes, but most importantly, I began cultivating a community and bringing people together.
From the moment I consciously chose sustainable fashion as my life’s purpose, there seemed to be a path emerging with opportunities piling up. I started a blog, chronicling my upcycling adventures. An Etsy store was created to sell the upcycled creations. I committed to buying only thrifted (mainly Kaimuki Goodwill) clothing for a year. Started volunteering, then organizing events for Hawaii Fashion Month. This all culminated in founding a conscious fashion organization with fellow sustainable fashion nerds.
I wasn’t designing the elaborate gowns that I saw on my vision board, but I was empowering others to grow their ethical fashion brands and reaching out to people in the community who hadn’t been exposed to conscious fashion. I came to realize that although design is important to the process, my ability to see the bigger picture, and inspire through story telling made me more impactful to the cause as a writer and organizer.
I look back fondly now, proud of myself for pushing through. It allowed me to find my place in the fight against fast fashion and gave me the direction I needed before throwing myself into the New York fashion world. Even though my early sustainable fashion days in Hawaii pale in comparison to what I have faced since moving to NYC, and what I’m sure I’ll face in my next chapter, it’s comforting to know that I’ll have the strength and self-accountability to keep going.
The Process
On a more personal level, the act of changing my consumer behavior proved to be the most crucial and challenging part of my journey. If you’re going to preach it, you better practice it. This forced me to examine what sustainable fashion meant for me and how I could fit it into my broke just-out-of-grad-school budget. For me, this meant thrifting and upcycling.
The first few months of committing to a sustainable fashion lifestyle was rough, it was hard to wrap my head around spending more money on quality products or buying thrifted goods that were bold fashion statements. I had panic attacks about how to buy clothes, and what sustainable fashion really meant. I lectured my friends whenever we went shopping that they shouldn’t buy clothes from the store we walked into, and would constantly be checking tags to see what garments were made of and where they were made. It was paralyzing.
Yet, as I went deeper into the world of thrifting and learned how to tweak pieces to make them my own, and I fell in love. By giving each garment a special touch and buying unique quirky pieces, my wardrobe was completely mine. Each piece of clothing had a story and I began to feel a deeper connection to what I put on my body.
Switching from a fast fashion to a conscious mindset is an ever evolving process, one that demands patience and curiosity. I’m still on my path and am far from perfect. Tools like this blog, surrounding myself with a supportive community and inspiration from designers and change-makers help me stay accountable. It’s been four years, and I’m still excited to learn more and find new ways to express myself through ethical fashion choices.